Words matter. When I was obese and I was trying to lose weight I would love when someone tells me you look good or asked if I had lost weight.
Those were very kind words that people would say to me almost daily when I went out in public. It becomes almost like an addiction where you are hoping someone notices the difference.
I have done a lot of thinking about this and please don’t take me wrong, people are just trying to be kind. It is a social flaw.
The question people should ask is “How are you feeling?”. Looks simply are a side benefit of how your mental state is.
Think about it for a moment. Once you flip the switch on your motivation to lose weight, where does that drive come from? Your mind. When you start running, or exercising? Again your mind.
I think your mental state drives your actions and that your actions lead to results. If you focus only on the looks you will be constantly chasing the scale addiction and looking for other people’s approval.
Your goals that come from within are your goals. Make them about achievements 10 pushups. Run 1 minute straight etc.
The right question to ask someone that you notice has lost weight is, How are you feeling or doing. If we take the time to ask others how they are we can lift the pressure of chasing the wrong things.
Asking how I am feeling shows people that you care about more than looks. You care about them.